Daddy Time: Give 'Em What They Need!

On this What Do You Have to Give Wednesday, I'd like to request a very special gift for some very special people from their incredible, irreplaceable fathers. As I'm sure you've noticed from today's blog post title, I'd like to focus attention on children (young and old). I'm asking fathers to give their offspring the gift of daddy time!

As both a wife and a mother, I completely understand the significance of our roles and positions in the world and definitely in the lives of our children. However, there's so much to be said about the relevance of our menfolk, especially when they are dads (or have the opportunity to mentor children who are without one). Without detailing the obvious, I'd just like to remind men everywhere that there's nothing in the world for children like daddy time.

So, on this wonderful Wednesday I send a special shout out to all of the wonderful men out there who are (much like my own husband), holding things down...training their boys to become men, cherishing their girls who will one day be women, taking their children to school, meeting their needs, laughing with them, crying with them, playing with them, and even praying for them. And for those of you fine fellas who have been a little too busy and a little less available for leisure time with your seed, it's not too late. It's the one thing they need that we women cannot give them...daddy time! Set aside some time to invest in your children (young and old). They won't soon forget it!

Practicing What I've Preached

Please accept my sincere apologies for a late blog post today. Usually, I prepare them a few days in advance, or at least the night before. However, today's blog didn't get done early because...well, I was practicing what I preached on the blog yesterday. I was spending quality time with my four sons who are home on Christmas break. You see, because a new year is quickly approaching, I spent most of Sunday evening preparing our minds, money, and moments for 2012. In other words, I was working on the Briscoe Budget for 2012. Needless to say, that took a great deal of my mommy-focus away from the boys so I spent all of Monday making up for lost time. So, here I am on this Tuesday morning trying to make up for my missed time with you.

How are you doing with your time management? Have you been prioritizing the need to savor some precious moments with the people you love (even if it means allowing certain responsibilities to temporarily fall through the cracks)? Trust me, it's not always easy to decide what or who to give the most time to in our busy schedules. Just as is true with our finances, sometimes it's hard to determine what needs our immediate attention and we can't allow indecision to keep us from finding a practical way to prioritize paying them both. The same is true of our time. Perhaps you want to organize your closet and put away those summer clothes, but you've always been wanting to take your daughter skating. Which one will take precedence over the other? Which matters most?

Of course, spending time with your child supersedes organizing your closet, but that doesn't change the fact that both need your attention, does it? Well, first focus on the one while planning to follow through with the other later. And just like me (apologies and all), enjoy what matters most without forgetting the other things that means so much to you (maybe you can invite your daughter to help you in the closet after you leave the rink). Don't allow life's circumstances to make you feel like you can't give the best of yourself to those who need you, and don't succumb to the pressures of your hectic schedule, allowing them to dictate to you which tasks you can or cannot accomplish. You may have to accomplish them a little later than you'd like, but you can get them done. And remember, money will come and go but the time you spend with the people you love will be etched forever in the hearts and minds of those you've shared it with.

Have a fabulous Tuesday!

Six Days 'Til Christmas

'Twas six nights before Christmas when all through the house, 

     not a wallet was stirring...not even a spouse. 

All purses were hung in their places with care, 

     in hopes that all money would remain unused in there.

Okay, so it's Monday and Christmas is only 6 days away! What does this mean to you? Hopefully, it means you've done all of the shopping you planned to do when you created your Christmas Spending Plan (you did create one right?). I pray that it means you've overcome the pressure to buy things you can't afford for people who probably already realize that fact. I'd be excited to learn that it means that the Christmas gifts you've prepared to give away are more creative and innovative than last year's, and less expensive than the gifts you've given over the past five years.

This week, I'd like to adjust the focus of the blog from talking about money and Christmas to considering our time and Christmas. Most of our children are or will soon be out of school and on Christmas break. Our friends and relatives are planning trips to visit with us for the holidays. And as much as our loved ones will appreciate the presents they might receive from under our Christmas trees, one of the best gifts we can possibly give them this week is our time...our undivided attention...priceless, quality time.

I know you have a lot going on this week. Whether you are closing out your business year, prepping your home for guests, or packing for your own trip, I realize that there's a lot left to be accomplished. Still, time is a gift God gives us each day, and it's a gift we need to appreciate by giving it at its best to the people in our lives. So, today I'm asking you to put a little thought into the days ahead and execute a plan that will allow you to give away one of the best gifts we'll ever be able to share with the ones we love...our time.

Take it Back: Possess Your Power!

This week we've talked about steering clear of celebrating Christmas on credit, not allowing credit card use to turn you into a beggar, admitting your debt to yourself and exposing it to someone you trust, and finally, intervening for those whose spending is out of control. Today, I'm encouraging everyone to take back their power. You haven't been using credit cards forever so believe or not, you can function without using them now. This Christmas, I want you to give yourself (or help someone else to gain) something that can't fit under the tree...independence...freedom from relying on credit cards. I want you to become liberated from your comfort with credit card spending and the convenience of swiping that card.

Remember what we've learned this week:  admitting and exposing our truth is the first step to any real change. If we're all going to possess our power and control our spending, reduce our debt and destroy our dependency on credit, we have to face our current realities. That means pulling out the those statements and noting the God's honest truth. Are we behind on our monthly payments? Have we been paying on the same balance far beyond the length of time it should have taken to obtain a zero balance? How much are we paying in interest? How much have we paid this year? How does that amount compare to the amount we've paid on the principle amount originally financed? What have we been paying in late fees and other charges? How long is it going to take to pay off our balances if we continue to only pay the minimum amounts due, and how will that affect our bottom line?

After we've finished noting these facts, it's time to determine our own truths and paint our own pictures. We'll do this by changing the game. Here's how:

• gather all credit cards and cut them up, have someone we trust to hold/hide them from us, or freeze them in a large container of water (get them out of our sights so we can work on getting them out of our minds),
• call our creditors to make arrangements if we're behind on our payments or if we need to reduce the amount of credit we have available, 
• make credit card payments on time,
• establish a realistic plan for paying off all credit card debt, 
• discipline ourselves and sacrifice additional funds monthly to pay down balances (commit a portion of every extra dollar that comes our way to reduce our debt),
• and finally, DO IT! Pay off every single debt and retire entirely from credit card abuse!

That's power, and that power is ours! Let's take it back from our creditors and possess it on our own!

Thirsty for an Intervention

Do you know someone who is drowning in credit card debt...someone who can't seem to control their spending habits? Has a friend recently revealed the truth about his or her credit card debt? Perhaps you've noticed that your sister's trips to the mall are getting out of control. What are you doing about what you see? How are you handling your concerns for your friend?

Just as most of us wouldn't sit around and watch silently while someone we love abuses drugs, we shouldn't standby and wink at our friends' reliance on credit cards (especially if their debt is growing). So, what should we do? Here are my suggestions for holding a private intervention:

• Brainstorm - write down your thoughts about your friend's credit card use and spending habits (it is important to be as specific as possible if you hope to successfully convey those concerns).
• Plan - figure out the most comfortable, conducive time and environment to talk to your friend (again, consider exactly what it is you want to say).
• Meet & Greet - show up on time and invest a few minutes in complimenting your friend for his or her attendance, appearance, and admirable strengths.
• Get serious - express your concerns and offer any advice and assistance you have to show your support and commitment to helping your friend to change his or her current habits.
• Share - reveal your own credit card journey and share what you've learned along the way.
• Cheer - reiterate your love, hope, and faith in your friend's ability to change his or her credit card use and reduce current credit card debt.
• Follow up - check in with your friend once a month, or at the least once a quarter (every 3 months) to see how he or she is doing and how you might be able to help.

Credit card debt is keeping too many of us awake at night, and is preventing too many of us from experiencing a variety of opportunities because of its affect on our credit ratings. You know someone in this situation, don't you? Well, today is the day for you to join me...get thirsty for an intervention, and then go make it happen!

Admit the Truth to Yourself; Expose it to Someone You Trust

What Do You Have to Give Wednesdays are usually devoted to giving the best of our time, energy, and resources to others. Today, I'd like for us to focus our attention on one thing we can give ourselves, and that's exposure and relief. I am challenging us to get honest and determine to make some much needed changes. Oftentimes, the first step to changing any habit, scenario, or circumstance is to admit it. The second step is to expose it. The more we try to hide the truth about our credit card debt, the greater the tendency for that debt to continue to grow (or at least stick around), overwhelming our minds and our income.
Today, I want us to take a good look at our credit card balances and find someone we can trust to admit our present truth to and get the support we need to change.

I've often heard the phrase, there's a thin line between love and hate. Well, I'd like to say that there also seems to be a thin line between success and failure, and the truth's power plays a significant role in determining which side of the line we find ourselves on. So again, I'm asking you to pull out those credit card statements and sit with that truth for a minute. Admit the bottom line to yourself out loud. Then, find a supportive, trustworthy friend or family member to expose your truth to. At first, the very idea of sharing it might seem embarrassing or just downright humiliating; but if you do this with a clear head and a clean heart, you'll find that revealing your secret will provide relief while opening the door to change...change that has the potential to achieve zero balances on those credit cards.

I know today's challenge might seem a bit scary, but I have faith in your willingness and ability to meet it and beat it. I'd love to hear about your process and results. Remember, you don't have to post your comments here. You can email me any time (cmbriscoe7312@gmail.com). 

Credit Cards: What Do They Say About You?

The truth is that there are credit card users and there are beggars. Which one are you? I'd like to think that you're neither, but the reality is that most consumers have and use at least one credit card on a regular basis. According to The Survey of Consumer Payment Choice, 78% of Americans own a credit card (Source: Federal Reserve Bank of Boston, January 2010).

Proverbs 21:5 in Old Testament scripture provides this wisdom:  Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty (New Living Translation). This can offer insight into the minds of credit card users and beggars. A wise consumer makes it his or her business to "owe no man", but a foolish consumer spends much of his or her life begging for opportunities to owe as many creditors as possible in order to enjoy as many short-lived luxuries and conveniences as he or she can.

Although I believe that debit cards can do the same, I understand that credit cards can be used as an effective tool for purchasing, tracking, and managing certain expenses. Mature credit card users are disciplined planners and executioners. They use their cards knowing when and how to pay their balances before they accrue interest and other fees. Beggars do not. Instead, they pursue bank credit cards and give in to department stores or other credit card offers without discipline, and definitely without a plan for managing the cards. They shop for the thrill and swipe without a purpose because they can.

Make no mistake about it:  if you keep swiping credit cards to borrow money you don't have the immediate means to pay back, you have become a beggar. You are guilty of soliciting external opportunities to purchase that which you know internally you are never planning to pay in full. That's not what credit cards are for, and that's not how mature, responsible adults are meant to live. Swipe if you must, but do so with a sure fire plan to pay the balance in full, and before your debt accrues interest. Choose (if necessary) to be a credit card user and determine to never ever become a beggar.